Go Do Things
This is for me. At least, it’s more for me than anyone else because it’s something I struggle with a lot. It’s not a moral failing or anything like that, though I suppose if taken to extremes, it could definitely push me to some spiritual places I would be better served avoiding. At my core, I am a homebody. I am also an introvert. I love being in my home with my people. I get uncomfortable even thinking about being around people I don’t know. So, I avoid going out and doing things. But deep down, I know that is not what is best for me.
My natural inclination is to avoid social gatherings, events, or things of that nature. Those sorts of things are just too much trouble most of the time for me. It’s much easier and more comfortable to just stay home. It doesn’t help that I also work from home.
Other than church (a vital non-negotiable), I spend the vast majority of my time in my home around only my wife and son. And that seems like the perfect setup for me. It’s my ideal way of living. But I am finding that it’s not the best or even the healthiest lifestyle. As hard as it can be for me, I need to get out of my house, be around people, and do things.
I’ll give you a couple of brief examples of times I chose the hard road of socializing and doing things and how those things were not only enjoyable but invigorating in a way I did not anticipate.
Last year, my wife and I were invited to attend a Celebration Gala for Child Evangelism Fellowship. We have supported them in the past, and this event was meant to celebrate their year and challenge attendees to get even more involved with their ministry. It wasn’t black tie, but we were encouraged to dress our best. If you know me at all, you know I do not dress up. I am a jeans and t-shirt kind of guy. Or a shorts and t-shirt guy even more often. This event was going to require I not only socialize, but I was going to have to do it with a coat and tie on. Things looked bleak.
Every element of that evening seemed designed to make me uncomfortable. Dressing up. Driving about 50 minutes from our house. Being around hundreds of people, most of whom I did not know. Small talk and all that nonsense. And while I was definitely uncomfortable at times, I ended up having a great time. My parents and my brother and sister-in-law were there, the food was good, the information given was challenging and encouraging, and I saw and spoke to a number of people I knew. And best of all, I spent the evening with my smoking hot wife at my side. I walked away feeling incredibly grateful I had agreed to attend.
My second example is from a concert my wife and I went to a few weeks ago. Late last year, John Van Deusen released the best album of the year. You can read my review here. When a show at a Nashville coffee house was announced, my wife and I immediately bought tickets. On our way there, I commented about how anxious I was feeling about going. It was a weeknight – we don’t do things on weeknights! We had to drive and find parking. We had to go into a small coffee house, interact with people, and sit in a small space surrounded by strangers. It was my nightmare!
And I loved it completely. Most of that is due to how incredible John Van Deusen was and how beautiful and amazing my wife is, but still, I had a great time. My social awkwardness was still present. My longing for my home, my space, and my peace and quiet never left me. But I pushed past those desires and found that doing things that on the surface make me uncomfortable and uneasy is good for me. The experience is worth the occasional bits of stress.
Doing things is good for your soul.
We are not meant to be alone, no matter how shy we are or how introverted we can be. And we are not meant to replace real human interaction with hiding behind screens. In our current technologically saturated culture, we are moving further and further away from in-person human interaction and more and more towards isolation and loneliness simply due to how easy it is.
As you can see from that chart, while young people are setting the pace for isolation, every age group is increasing in this metric. Couple this with declining mental health stats, and it’s easy to see we are not headed anywhere good. To be clear, this is not necessarily a “cause and affect” scenario. There are many factors involved in the decline in mental health in our country, and it’s too big of a topic to deal with here. Yet I think it’s clear the two are intertwined and feeding off of each other in a dangerous symbiotic relationship. We are self-isolating and it is making us miserable.
This article is obviously not a deep dive into this phenomenon, and I offer very little beyond personal anecdotes, but I think your experience will recognize this trend as true and potentially catastrophic for our society and our souls. When I spend more time alone, or with just the people I love the most, I find my patience for others starts to plummet. I am less gracious, less loving, and less forgiving. And not to get too spiritual, my light is not going to shine very brightly if it’s always safely concealed in my house.
So, here’s my challenge. If you are like me and going out of your house and doing things creates a mini panic attack in your heart, push through that feeling. More than likely, it’s not actual panic or anxiety that is holding you back. It’s lethargy and a strong pull to avoid any situation that takes you out of your comfort zone. Go to events. Go to concerts. Go to church. Invite people to your home. Be around people. These things have value beyond what we immediately recognize.
I still love being home with my people and that is never going to change. But I have decided that I need to resist the siren call of home from time to time and force myself to go do things. Because more often than not, those things will end up becoming moments that leave a lasting impression on my heart and change me for the better.
Go do things.
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