There are plenty of things that people say that are dumb, annoying or inane. I will focus on five of the biggest offenders. To facilitate understanding, I have included cutting edge pictures and illustrations.
To the list!
1. Literally. Here is an example: “I was so mad my head literally exploded!” No. Your head did not literally explode. If it had literally exploded, we would not have to listen to you abuse and destroy the English language. Do us all a favor and literally stop talking. Forever.
2. Hump Day. Wednesday is also known as Hump Day. Stop and think about that for just a second. Hump Day.
Hump Day? HUMP DAY!
And people say that like it’s a good thing! How is it possible for a day that is called “Hump” to be good? It’s not. The word hump brings all sorts of unpleasant and unsavory images to mind. Why would we intentionally equate the middle day of the work-week with anything unpleasant?
3. We need to love on them. In an effort to keep this as clean and as family friendly as possible, I am going to avoid really dissecting this one. You see it, right? Why have we decided that saying “We need to love them” is so much less effective than to “love on them”? As for me and my house, there shall be no “loving on” anyone. We will love, show love, be loving, act with love, and above all share love. And all of those things will be done to and for others, not on them.
4. I could care less. If you can care less, then that means you actually care at least a little bit for whatever it is that you are talking about. Let me provide you with a very simple visual representation of what you are saying and what you should be saying. First, we will look at “I could care less”:
What you should say in this situation is “I could not care less” about soccer. Let’s go to the chart!
5. It is what it is. It’s either lazy or apathetic. Or both. Too often, we try to sum up a really complex issue or conversation with this nifty little catch-all phrase. It is nonsensical in that it is so mind-numbingly obvious. Of course IT is what It is. What else could it be? It’s like saying “The ocean is the ocean” or “Blue is blue” or “this pizza is pizza.”
Sample conversation below:
Human Being 1: Man, things are really difficult for me right now.
Human Being 2: It is what it is.
HB1: What is it?
HB2: It’s what it is.
HB1: Why is that?
HB2: Because it just is.
HB1: Oh, is it?
HB2: Yes, it is.
HB1: I don’t think it is what it is. I think it’s not what it is.
HB2: That’s not possible.
HB1: Why not?
HB2: Because it is what it is.
HB1: But what if it doesn’t want to be what it is anymore?
HB2: It can’t just decide that. It has to be what it is at all times.
HB1: But what if what it is is stupid?
HB2: It’s not.
HB1: Are you sure? There are a lot of stupid things out there.
HB2: I’m sure. It is what it is and that is enough for me.
HB1: Fine. Does that mean it’s not what it’s not?
HB2: This conversation is boring and dumb.
HB1: It is what it is.
HB2: You are the worst.